Ok, so I haven't blogged in a really long time. Oh well. I found this note on Facebook and it's actually something from my friend Natalie. It seriously had my laughing so hard and I want you to enjoy it with me!
This is a collection of funny calls, stupid questions, and crazy antics encountered at the USU Switchboard. There wasn't really anywhere else to post it, and I felt like the general public needed access. Enjoy!
Elderly male caller: So… are you like… the operator of the whole Universe?
Natalie: Yes. Yes, I am.
Caller: Hey, is Heidi there?
Natalie: Heidi who? Do you know her last name?
Caller: The one you can reach out and touch…
Caller: Hi, is there any way I can get in touch with my kids? They’re at USU for EFY. I just want to tell them I’ll be there soon.
Natalie: No, sorry. I can try the Youth Programs number and they might be able to get in touch with them somehow.
Caller: No, that’s okay. I’ll just be a few minutes.
[About 20 minutes later, the same lady calls back]
Caller: How far away is Utah State from the University of Utah?
Natalie: About an hour and a half.
Caller: S#*@! Where can my kids go to wait for me for an hour and a half?
Caller: Hi, can I get the Wealth and Hellness Center?
Heidi: [Intro]
Man: Steve Mercy… um Murphy. Steve Murphy. I’m sorry sir—MA’AM!
Heidi: It’s ok. One moment.
Man: I’m sorry…
Caller: I need Melanie Pool please.
Katie: Umm…
Caller: Oh, I mean Pond! Melanie Pond. Sorry.
Caller: What’s the school’s website?
Operator: www.usu.edu
Caller: No, that’s not working!
Operator: Maybe the server is down…
Caller: No, tell me it again.
Operator: www.usu.edu
Caller: No dot com?
Operator: Nope.
Caller: Oh, I know why it wasn’t working… I was in a word document.
Female caller: Hi. I just got a call from this number about the results for my testicles...
Caller: Can I get the lunchroom?
Heidi: Where?
Caller: The lunchroom.
Heidi: I don’t know what you mean… What is it for?
Caller: Well, I was told to call the lunchroom for housing.
Heidi: Let me send you to housing at the Lundstrom.
Jess: Utah State
Caller: Graduation please.
Jess: Okay, which college is the graduation for?
Caller: Utah State.
Jess: Do you know what area of study the graduation is for?
Caller: Um, prison.
(Eventually it was narrowed down to HASS)
Alisa: Utah State
Caller: Hello!
Alisa: Hello, Utah State?
Caller: You’re not at Utah State by the way. [laughing]
Alisa: What? This is Utah State…
Caller: [5 second pause] … Oh, wrong number.
Rachel: Utah State
Little kid (LK): Who are you?
Rachel: Who are you?
LK: Who are you?
Rachel: I am the operator.
LK: Oh hi, I don’t want my brother to go to jail, my mom is already there.
Rachel: What did your brother do?
LK: (whispering something)
Rachel: What?
LK: He said shut up! (yelling)
Rachel: He won’t go to jail for that. It’s okay. Can I go now?
LK: Yes, okay bye.
Rachel: Bye
Caller: Hi, um… I need to talk to someone about chickens. I have these chickens here, and I need to talk to someone about them. Is there like a 4H club I can talk to?
Caller: Look, I need to talk to someone in the registrar’s office. I can’t talk to a machine, and no one is answering their phones. So, can you walk down there and give them my number and have them call me?
Caller: Hi, I’m coming from Salt Lake and I need to know if I’ve passed the USU exit. I’m passing a big building with a sign that says “Welcome home, Elder.”
Alisa & Emily: Um, I’m not sure where you are.
Caller: I’m passing mile marker 361.
A&E: I think you’re too far north.
Caller: Okay, I’m passing a sign that says “this town” 21 miles. Exit 382 or something.
A&E: You’re almost to Idaho. You need to turn around and take the Brigham City exit.
Caller: Idaho?! Dang. Well I’m not sure where to get off to turn around.
A&E: Just find the next freeway exit, get off the freeway, then there should be a south-bound I-15 entrance right there. Then just keep driving until you get to Brigham City exit 362.
Emily: Utah State
Caller: How do I find you?
Emily: Where do you want to go?
Caller: University Inn
Emily: Where are you?
Caller: USU Brigham City extension. How far up Main Street do I go?
Emily: You need to come into Logan. You are 20 miles away…
Caller: Crap!
Stephanie: Utah State
Caller: You guys called me?
Stephanie: This is the operator at Utah State. Do you know who might have called you?
Caller: What?
Stephanie: Any outgoing call from Utah State shows up as this number.
Caller: Hold on! [talks to person in background].
[Spanish yelling]
(girl) Hold on.
Come get the phone!
Hold on, I’m in the bathroom!
The phone is for you!
Hold on!
Open the door. I’ll hand you the phone.
Hold on! [door opens] Hello.
Stephanie: Hi, this is Utah State. You called us.
Caller: Sorry. [hangs up]
Kayleen: Utah State
Caller: Can I get campus rec?
Kayleen: One moment. (Tries to transfer, gets busy signal)
Kayleen: I’m sorry, that number is busy. Would you like me to transfer you?
Caller: To the busy signal?!
Caller: Could you ask around and see if Shawn is with you?
Caller: Hi, I have a gifted and talented child. I need to talk to someone about him.
Caller: I broke something wooden. Can you help me?
Operator: Are you alright? What happened?
Caller: Well I was driving through the business parking lot and the wooden thing broke.
Operator: Ok, do you want to talk to the police?
Caller: Will I be in trouble?
Operator: It’s alright, they can help you.
Caller: Is Christy there?
Operator: Do you know a last name or a department?
Caller: She’s the obnoxious one standing right next to you.
Caller: Do you guys get paid to answer the phone?
Operator: Yes.
Caller: That is so cool.
Caller: I forgot the guy’s name… Tell me a few.
Caller: Hi, I need info on the Aggiettes. My friend wants to set me up with one of them and I really need to find out if she’s cute. Don’t they have picture postings on campus?
Caller: Can I get a room number?
Operator: I can’t connect you to room numbers. Do you know the department?
Caller: 213.
Operator: What department?
Caller: 213.
Operator: Utah State.
Caller: Is this Utah State?
Caller: Can you walk down to the TSC and tell the survival people my son will be late?
Caller: Is there a major office where I can find out what my major is?
Caller: Can I be connected to Mary Jo?
Beth: Do you know a last name?
Caller: Yes.
Caller: Can you connect me to the cyber library?
Caller: Hi. I have a question on your alfalfa.
Caller: Is this information?
Amber: It is.
Caller: Good. I have a question… my toenail is falling off. Should I rip it off or leave it?
Caller: Someone forgot to put my cow sheets in the barn.
Caller: Can I get the Barnes and Noble bookstore?
Caller: Can I talk to Larry? He lives somewhere between Logan and Smithfield.
Caller: Hi.
Operator: Hi.
Caller: Gary Leishman
Operator: … He’s not listed. Do you know what department?
Caller: No, that’s who’s speaking. I’m looking for the development office.
Caller: Who did I call?
Kayleen: This is the operator.
Caller: Oh. So what do I do, just say sorry and hang up?
Caller: When’s lunch time?
Caller: I’m trying to find out if the bookstore still sells a candy bar. Can someone go over there and look for me?
Caller: Can I speak with somebody please?
Operator: What department?
Caller: I don’t know.
Caller: I’m trying to pay my fees in the treasure office.
Caller: I got stung by a bee on my lip and now I look like Quasimodo. What do I do?
Caller: Can I get the library?
Operator: Which one?
Caller: It’s the one on Old Main Hill.
Caller: Hi, I’d like to donate my testicle.
Caller: Hi, I have a question about my pressure cooker.
Caller: Is this the Utah State prison?
Caller: [July 8th] Hi. Do you know who is in charge of choosing the University Christmas Tree?
Caller: What’s the number for housing?
Operator: It’s 797-3113. Can I transfer you?
Caller: Does it cost anything?
Caller: Can I speak to Jim Cranney?
Joni: Is that spelled C-R-A-N-N-E-Y?
Caller: No, it’s C-R-A-N-N-E-Y.
Caller: To go downstairs, do you just go down those stairs by the elevator?
Caller: Hi, someone called this number and I’m wondering if you had something that needed to be said.
Caller: Hey, I’m from the West Desert over here, so I got some infections in some chickens and a turkey here. Some folks told me to call – so where do I go?
Operator: Utah State
Caller: Utah State what?
Operator: Utah State University
Caller: Someone just called me.
Operator: We can’t track it.
Caller: So is this the hospital?
Operator: NO! This is the UNIVERSITY.
Caller: Oh… Utah State University…
Caller: Just calling back this number. Did you call?
Collette: No. This is the operator at Utah State University. We didn’t call you.
Caller: Oh you are in Colorado!
Collette: No, UTAH. Utah State University.
Caller: Oh. Ok.
Caller: Do students have to go home during Christmas break?
Caller: I’m in the business building right now, and well, stuck in the elevator…
Caller: Did you just call me?
Beth: This is a general number for the university, you’ll have to wait for them to call you back.
[a few minutes pass]
Caller: Hi, it’s me again. You said you’d call me back.
Male caller: Hi, can you connect my beautiful self to Cedra Jensen?
Caller: Hi, I need the Business of College.
Caller: How do you clean the bottom of an electric iron? It got sort of scorched while I was out of town.
Caller: I have a question for you.
Rachel: Yes, go ahead.
Caller: I was wondering if when babies are born, do they get tested for diseases?
Rachel: Do you know who you are calling?
Caller: I just want to talk to a doctor or nurse.
Rachel: Oh, well this it he operator at USU. I could give you the hospital’s number because the health center is closed.
Caller: Okay, that would be great.
Made my day a little brighter :)
.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Happy Sunday!
Well it is Sunday and what better to do than to blog a little bit? Ok to follow a bit in the foot steps of someone I've always looked up to, Katie Goudie, we're gonna do a bullet list :)
- This week has kind of been sucky for me because I've really been missing all my boys on missions more than usual. I love everyone in my life, don't get me wrong but personally when I'm struggling with things I like to get quite opinions from quite a few, however select people. But the good news is that I no longer have farewells to attend to; they're all homecomings!!! Hazzah!
- Friday might have been one of the craziest days I've had in awhile. All events I went to were wonderful and so much fun... It was just having them all on one day kinda made me want to fold over and die multiple times in the course of about 10 hours. My roommate Caitlin and I even had plans after all was said and done to go to a movie but we were both so tired that we went to bed at 11:30... on a Friday night. Definitely something wrong with that statement haha.
- I'm making dinner for a couple people in my ward today. Yeeeaaah its a recipe that I've never tried before so fingers crossed that it turns out well. I need all the help I can get because I ain't no Holly Homemaker.
- The quote wall in our apartment has begun. 'Nough said.
- My best friend is getting married in one month and two days. Holy cow, I can't believe how fast that snuck up on me! It seems like just yesterday that she was telling me that they decided to get married. I couldn't be more happy for her :) I'm still slightly shocked by the fact that I set them up... Just because I am by no means a match-maker haha lets take a look at my own love life here....
- I just can't describe how much dancing has made my life not only bearable but exciting. I'm sure you guys will be sick of hearing about dancing from me very, very soon but it is a LARGE part of my life so it will be mentioned quite frequently.
- Ok does anyone have the book Believing in Christ?? I want to read it but I'm kind of poor so I'd rather borrow than buy. Please :)
- My roommates Hailey and Sarah wrote a song called Muffin Love. You are very priviledged if you ever get to hear this haha.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Wolverine! Rawwwrrr
I began school again this week and I must say, I think it's going to be my favorite year yet for a couple of reasons. Let the list begin:
1. I'm mentoring yet again and I am so excited to work with my new instructor! Rick Mosholder is probably one of the smartest people I've ever met and I can't wait to learn everything I can from him. Also I love being back with mentors. The people in this program are the cream of the crop. I really do believe that we've created a tight-knit community that can grow from one another, as well as just have a good time as friends :) To top it off, my class is the absolute best (all you mentors might disagree, but deep down you know its true).
2. I am dancing. Oh what a wonderful phrase that is! I get to do what I love every single day of my life and I realize how lucky I am to say that. Even though my body is aching, I couldn't be happier. Word of advice to young dance majors: don't take the summer off. It comes back to bite you in the rear right at the start of fall semester.
3. My apartment complex. I love the people in my ward and I cannot WAIT to get to know Bishop Hawkins better. I've heard nothing but wonderful praises about him and in the few times I have met him, I can already tell that I love this man.
This year is going to be complete chaos but thats how I like it :) Hopefully I'll be able to maintain this blog pretty regularly, but no promises. Homework does come before so Mom, no worries, I'll be doing what I'm supposed to.
Happy Friday everyone!!
1. I'm mentoring yet again and I am so excited to work with my new instructor! Rick Mosholder is probably one of the smartest people I've ever met and I can't wait to learn everything I can from him. Also I love being back with mentors. The people in this program are the cream of the crop. I really do believe that we've created a tight-knit community that can grow from one another, as well as just have a good time as friends :) To top it off, my class is the absolute best (all you mentors might disagree, but deep down you know its true).
2. I am dancing. Oh what a wonderful phrase that is! I get to do what I love every single day of my life and I realize how lucky I am to say that. Even though my body is aching, I couldn't be happier. Word of advice to young dance majors: don't take the summer off. It comes back to bite you in the rear right at the start of fall semester.
3. My apartment complex. I love the people in my ward and I cannot WAIT to get to know Bishop Hawkins better. I've heard nothing but wonderful praises about him and in the few times I have met him, I can already tell that I love this man.
This year is going to be complete chaos but thats how I like it :) Hopefully I'll be able to maintain this blog pretty regularly, but no promises. Homework does come before so Mom, no worries, I'll be doing what I'm supposed to.
Happy Friday everyone!!
Monday, August 16, 2010
So I Think I Can Dance?
Every summer I become obsessed with So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD) and I fall in love with this art all over again. Watching the routines every week and how these choreographers captivate me make me wish I was so much better than I am. I see the passion and inspiration in every movement, breath and moment that is performed on that stage and I want to got create until I have nothing left.
For as long as I can remember, dance has been my answer. For everything. When I feel frustrated, angry, hurt, sad, confused, joyous, ecstatic, silly, infatuated, loved, inspired, lost, satisfied and a myriad of other emotions, I turn to dance to truly express myself. I can use words to a certain extent to express myself but it is only when I dance that I feel I "say" everything that I wish to. Even now trying to tell whomever may be reading this how much dance does for me, I can't say exactly what I mean but I can see how I would move in my head to tell you. Dance is my joy, it is my pain. It is my hell and it is my sanctuary. Where I breathe and become at a loss for words. Dance gives me my words and I use my body as my voice. I know that I'm not the most fluid with what I'm trying to say but I hope that this short paragraph/post/whatever gives people a small taste of how much dance means to me and why if I get the chance to move, I take it. No questions asked.
For as long as I can remember, dance has been my answer. For everything. When I feel frustrated, angry, hurt, sad, confused, joyous, ecstatic, silly, infatuated, loved, inspired, lost, satisfied and a myriad of other emotions, I turn to dance to truly express myself. I can use words to a certain extent to express myself but it is only when I dance that I feel I "say" everything that I wish to. Even now trying to tell whomever may be reading this how much dance does for me, I can't say exactly what I mean but I can see how I would move in my head to tell you. Dance is my joy, it is my pain. It is my hell and it is my sanctuary. Where I breathe and become at a loss for words. Dance gives me my words and I use my body as my voice. I know that I'm not the most fluid with what I'm trying to say but I hope that this short paragraph/post/whatever gives people a small taste of how much dance means to me and why if I get the chance to move, I take it. No questions asked.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Dear Michael Sandberg
Dear Michael,
I now have a blog. And we shall communicate in yet another way. All the time. From PLs to BLs. Are you happy now? Because I am :) Hazzah!! Go life. Time for Rio. Cheri, hurry up and get off of work. You are still not here. Boo. I'm hungry.
Love, Me.
I now have a blog. And we shall communicate in yet another way. All the time. From PLs to BLs. Are you happy now? Because I am :) Hazzah!! Go life. Time for Rio. Cheri, hurry up and get off of work. You are still not here. Boo. I'm hungry.
Love, Me.
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